Why do Changing Room mirrors make me feel body conscious?

So I am going on holiday to Tenerife this week and I knew I couldn’t be lounging by the swimming pool in my jumpers and leggings so I decided to go shopping for some more appropriate clothes! For the record, I ended up spending more money than I am comfortable to admit but I am happy with my purchases and can’t wait to wear everything in the sun!

But one thing I had to do was try on some bikinis… We didn’t go on holiday last year and I used to struggle with my weight and I was slim however since I started college and have had to deal with a few difficult situations, I have noticed that I’ve put on a bit of weight since I went on holiday last so when I had to buy some bikinis I knew I was going to want to curl up in a ball and cry.

I chose a couple to try on and wandered into the changing rooms and I noticed something bizarre…  Changing room mirrors make me appear so much larger than I thought I was? I didn’t understand why my body looked so horrible in a bikini when it fit well. I am already quite body conscious, what teenage girl isn’t?! But these mirrors made me look horrendous! I was shopping with my sister and she agreed with me that the mirrors in there made her feel bad about herself so I knew it wasn’t just me! I bought the bikinis and when I tried them on again at home I felt so much more comfortable with my body but now I’m panicking because is my room lying to me?! Are changing room mirrors how other people see me? Because if so, I will be wearing my onesie for the duration of my holiday!

I did a quick google search and most people were saying it was the lighting in the changing rooms that made you look bad. The one that I was in made my skin a very grey colour and made my thighs look so wobbly. I have quite a curvy figure but I wouldn’t consider myself overweight but trying bikinis on in these changing rooms ruined my day! Why do they have such horrible lighting in there if they want people to purchase from the shop? People are not going to buy clothes that a mirror made them feel uncomfortable in! When I researched, I found out that a lot of mirrors bought in for changing rooms are made of cheap glass and a lot of it is stretched which can make you look wider than you are. Some even make you look taller and slimmer, I suppose it all depends on how much the establishment are willing to splash out! I doubt they bear in their mind that teenage girls will be looking in them wanting to cry themselves to sleep and try to motivate themselves to exercise all day!

The moral of the story is, do NOT take notice of the mirrors in changing rooms. They are the enemy and make you look 10 times worse! You are all beautiful and you should all feel comfortable with your figure. I will definitely be flaunting my new bikinis in clothes in Tenerife and I hope none of you have let these mirrors affect your confidence!

Happy holidays!! X

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‘Ding dong the witch is dead?’

After being surprised about the death of one of the 1980’s most iconic figures, I must say what shocked me more were the opinions of young, uneducated people on social networking sites – mainly twitter who were sharing their thoughts about the woman as a person saying things like ‘Margaret Thatcher the evil cow has died’ and even nastier tweets were made about her death! The ironic thing is that the majority of people tweeting were not alive at the time Thatcher was serving.

Margaret Thatcher was not only the first and only woman Prime Minister to this day, she was also the longest serving Prime Minister of the 20th century. Therefore I, along with many others I’d like to believe find her a woman to look up to because of how she handled her responsibilities. Although, I can’t deny the fact that Thatcher may have made various wrong decisions for our country and left a bit of a mess behind for the next Prime Minister.

I still believe it is wrong that people from around the country have made ‘Ding dong the witch is dead’ from the 1939 film The Wizard of Oz got to number 2 in the music charts. The majority of BBC Radio 1’s target audience are younger people therefore, most people listening to the chart show are not going to fully understand why this song is there and a bad opinion on Margaret Thatcher is going to go viral and people who know absolutely nothing about her are going to form very negative opinions on her.

At the end of the day, Margaret Thatcher was a person, she had a life and a family. When she made those decisions she obviously thought they were right at the time. Everyone makes bad decisions once in a while but just because it affected our country badly it doesn’t mean that it is right to disrespect her. When she was alive, people weren’t calling her an evil cow all over social networking sites all day long but since she passed away, everyone’s opinions are stronger than ever and I personally think that is wrong and disrespectful to her family and friends.

BBC Radio One did the right thing when it reached the time to play the number 2 song in the weekly chart. They mentioned the song yet did not play it. She was just another person and deserves respect after her death. She didn’t murder anyone she just made decisions that she had the right to make. I understand if you were alive when she was serving and you were personally affected but if you are my age (teenage years) I don’t think you have the right to be disrespectful to her as it was in the past and our country has developed a lot since then.

Where’s the world that doesn’t care? Maybe I could meet you there?

I woke up this morning only to discover that I had reached 1,000 views on my blog! I was so pleased when I saw this and felt like writing something. However, I appear to be suffering from extreme writers block at this current moment so I decided to take up the opportunity to use WordPress’ feature called ‘inspire me’ which seems to be a random generator giving you an idea to write about something, and the following text is basically my brief:

Take a line from a song that you love or connect with. Now forget the song, and turn that line into the title or inspiration for your post.

It took me a while to choose a line from a song because I usually listen to a song for the music however; I eventually came to a conclusion and decided to use a line from Meet you there – Busted. The following article is about how people care too much about what others think.

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I know this is an issue in today’s society because I feel under pressure to look presentable each and every day, even if I have nothing planned. And personally, I wish everyone had the same hair and skin, I wish make up didn’t exist and imagining a world where you can wear whatever you like without worrying about others judging you is extremely pleasant but I suppose one can only dream. Honestly, I don’t know why I bother sometimes, I have amazing people in my life and surely they couldn’t care less about what I looked like, that isn’t the reason they stick by me.

I think this is an issue that is a lot worse at a young age. Many teenagers follow the crowd to look good and prevent being judged. However, if you want to wear something outgoing then you have every right to do so. It’s simply the fact that you are paranoid about what others are going to think, if you walk down the street wearing something even slightly different to what would be classed as the norm, there is no doubt that another girl or boy of your age will look at you in a bizarre way and whisper something to their friend. It makes you feel looked down on but if you’re happy and comfortable with how you’re dressed and how you look, no matter how challenging it is, you have to rise above it. You may have heard someone saying things behind your back about your style, learn to ignore it. We’re in the 21st century and as sick as it is, bullies exist. And people are going to say things, and yes, it is disheartening but when people criticise how you look, they want a reaction and they want you to care. So surely that’s the last thing you want?

The worst thing you can do whilst trying not to care what others think of you is overthinking a situation. If you’re in the middle of a city or at school, look around and see how many other people are there. You’re not alone therefore, a lot of the time, people are probably not even judging you. Most people in this world don’t have the time to look at someone and soak in all their flaws and analyse them as a whole just by their imperfections, try your best not to think about what they’re thinking of you and bear in mind that they may be judging the people around you.

The people who care about what you look like are usually the ones who look at you with metaphorical microscopes as eyes and judge people they don’t even know for a mile off whereas people who don’t obsess over others tend to look at you as a whole person not just what you look like by the way you dress and how you have your hair and make-up. There is no point in wasting your time worrying what others think about you, it will make your life hell for a good few years if you continue to allow the criticism get to your head. If you begin to let yourself feel positive about yourself and your style, as you venture out into the public, you’ll feel confident outdoors too and will stop feeling like everyone cares about what you look like.

If you never accept yourself, as harsh as it is, people will never accept you. Be who you want to be. If people want to be an acquaintance of yours then they will not care what you look like or how you dress and if they do care then I can tell you now that they’re not worth a second of your time. If you’re someone who doesn’t judge others, then you’re instantly better than the people who obsess over how others look. Take no notice and walk around with a smile on your face at all times so everyone knows you don’t care what they think.

‘Where’s the world that doesn’t care? Maybe I could meet you there?’

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What do you think of Valentine’s Day?

The official definition of Valentine is ‘a person to whom one sends such a card or whom one asks to be one’s sweetheart’ and the term Valentine’s Day is known as ‘a day for the exchange of tokens of affection.’  But has this changed over the years? I am a teenage girl and for the past 2 years I have been in a relationship for this occasion but now I’m single and I found it surprising yet interesting to see how drastically my opinion on this day changed in quite a short space of time therefore I was inspired to write the following article about this day.

Valentine’s Day is an annual celebration which falls on the 14th day of the month. It is usually celebrated by giving flowers, chocolate and cards those you love. We do these things in honour of Saint Valentine. Nowadays, many people don’t really think about this. However, it is said that Valentine was a priest during the third century Rome. At this time, there was an Emperor named Claudius II who claimed that married soldiers lacked strength other than single soldiers who were more capable of their occupation therefore he outlawed marriage for young men aspiring to become soldiers so he could have a stronger army. Supposedly, Valentine decided against this as he thought it was unfair and chose to marry young couples in secret. That is one story, there is also a legend that has been told claiming that Valentine was a man in prison who fell in love with his jailor’s daughter and before he was killed he sent the first ‘Valentine’ to himself when he wrote the woman a letter signing it with ‘Your Valentine’ this is why people are lead to believe why these words are still used on cards in the 21st century.

I decided to carry out a bit of my own research and discover what people I know think about this day. I asked the following 4 people what their true opinion on Valentine’s Day was:

14 year old female: ‘I think Valentine’s Day is just a pointless holiday where card companies sell cards to send to people purely to gain more money however, if you love someone that much you should celebrate it every day of the year not just one day. If Valentine’s Day is going to exist it should be about people who like someone and aren’t confident enough to tell them and of course, Mcdonalds get a lot of money because it’s where all the single people go to drown their sorrows.’ (I do apologise for my little sisters embarrassing love for food.)

17 year old male: ‘I think it’s a good day if you are one of those people who enjoys all that cute relationship stuff, it means you can spend the day treating your girlfriend like a princess but when people who are single go on about it, it turns into a sort of joke, they’ll laugh about being single and spending it with their cat etc when deep down everyone wants someone to spend the day with no matter what they say.’

Married man: ‘A commercial gimmick for card companies to make loads of money, nobody really buys into it. It’s expensive and everyone goes out so the service in restaurants and hotels is poor.’

Married woman: ‘It’s alright for a bit of fun when you’re a teenager or in a new relationship otherwise it’s a commercial opportunity for greed, it’s not even just cards, everything in shops is Valentine’s this, Valentine’s that.’

I found this intriguing because I suppose my opinion is all of those bonded together. When I was in a relationship, I saw Valentine’s day as another day however, spending it with my boyfriend did feel special and seeing someone’s face light up when you give them a gift is always a lovely feeling so I like it for that however now that I’m single, I dread walking down the streets seeing young couples holding hands because it makes me feel lonely and it is such a mood kill to feel that way! I do agree about the businesses getting money out of people and I personally believe it is more of a day you put thought into gifts for example photo frames, handwritten letters and so on. But there are some delightful things you can purchase for the ones you love nowadays and sometimes the money is worth it if you truly love them.

I can’t help but remember my primary school days, being young and not really caring, we used to send our ‘crushes’ cards signed with a question mark, I think it would be lovely if Valentine’s Day was dedicated to people who never had the confidence to tell someone how they felt or if someone could never pluck up the courage to ask them out. The fact that couples are now pressured into purchasing gifts/cards for their significant other can be somewhat stressful but ‘it’s the thought that counts’

What are your views on Valentine’s Day?

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The 1975 @ The Cockpit, Leeds/ 24.01.2013

Wonderful article on a wonderful band. Everyone take a read!

WHATELLATHINKS

The 1975 @ The Cockpit, Leeds/ 24.01.2013

So, the trip hop quartet were back (with special guests!) to perform once again at the grunge, underground venue, The Cockpit. As you all know, this place is dedicated to hand-picking the best bands out of the glimmering sea of new music, catching exciting new artists at the start of their careers. Yeah, it’s true, the stage has the faded footprints of the Two Door Cinema Club, Temper Trap and Coldplay to prove it. Over the last year, the UK have willingly welcomed The 1975’s mixed genre style with open arms after the release of not one, but TWO EP’s (Sex and Facedown) including ready-made anthems such as The City and Sex. They had already created a buzz around the country after touring the UK with guitar-heavy, cheerful Little Comets but this time it was different, they were back… but headlining.

I guess I should start from the beginning of…

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Coping with academic stress

Do you ever feel as though you can’t completely relax during the holiday periods? Is the stress of studying constantly eating away at your brain? I hope to give you some tips on how to handle this stress in a way that will also help you achieve the grades you need to succeed.

Stress is quite a common reaction when you are dealing with certain things and one of the main issues teenagers have to face today is the stress of fitting in enough revision to do well in exams. A lot of the time, adolescents don’t realise they are stressed due to the amount of work they have to complete for a certain deadline, however, it is very important that you remain placid by following several tips and maintaining a regular routine.

A vital thing you must do is continually remind yourself that everything will get better and the stress is only temporary, after you have put the effort in to succeed you will feel so positive about yourself and your work. Keep imagining the relief you will feel once you have completed the work you need to do. Obviously, stress affects you mentally however, it can also affect you physically in various ways for example; a racing heartbeat, breathlessness, nausea, headaches, tiredness, panic attacks and loss of appetite. If you suffer from any of these during studying, you know it is time to take a break. The BBC Schools website advise you take out at least 10 minutes whilst you revise to allow your brain to switch off and have a little rest. I attempted various different activities during my revision breaks ranging from watching television to eating as much as I possibly could in that short space of time but what I found most effective was to go for a short walk, just down your street or around where you live or simply a walk around your garden. I discovered that obtaining a moderate amount of fresh air clears your mind and prepares it to be bombarded with even more thoughts once your break is over.

There are more ways to beat the stress that you may be facing. You are not the only one in this position though, it is almost certain that all of your friends and peers are experiencing exactly the same feelings as you. Some people can control their stress but others can lose it and struggle a lot. Talking to your friends about what is worrying you is suggested by a lot of people as they understand what you are going through and you will be able to support each other throughout the stressful period and I can assure you, you will feel so grateful once they have helped you.

I cannot emphasise enough how important the amount of sleep you acquire is. Getting a full nights rest is required throughout the whole exam period. Teenagers are supposed to achieve 8 hours of sleep per night to function properly, especially during a stressful time. However, getting too much sleep is a bad idea and will leave you feeling weak and woozy. As one of the effects of stress is loss of appetite it is essential you eat small regular meals and be sure to drink a lot of water to prevent yourself becoming dehydrated. Because studying and the stress of it all is extremely time consuming, when teenagers are told they should exercise to help with their stress, most of them will scoff and completely ignore that advice. However, it is a proven fact that yoga is a successful way of taking your mind off your worries, teaching you to relax in the process. Another useful thing to do is produce a plan of the work you have to do, you will find that being organised with your revision will reduce panicking.

Self Harm

It is said that 1 in 12 teenagers self harm however the majority are girls…

10% of girls have admitted to ever self harming 6% of boys have admitted to ever self harming

The study that was taken out was on 1,802 people and the results show that the average age of people who self harm is 15. Saying cutting and burning were the most common self injury methods. And the most common objects used are razor blades, knives and scissors.

Teenagers and even adults self harm to get things out of their system which may have caused them emotional pain. Because a lot of what people do to hurt themselves are short, shocking pains for example burning, pinching, cutting and scratching it provides temporary relief however afterwards, it comes to their realisation that the deeper pain they are suffering is not going to be solved by doing this therefore it makes them feel like if they keep doing these short pains, enough of them will get rid of the deep sadness they are suffering.

Anxiety disorders and depression are a big cause of self harm. The main place people choose to cut themselves are on the wrists and thighs because these are the places which are not so hard to hide. People tend to avoid places like the face and hands which are on show most of the time.

I know for a fact that many people see self harm as attention seeking but it isn’t at all, it’s completely psychological and more than often comes down to mental illness or sexual abuse as a child. In a lot of cases it is things from the past coming back to haunt them as a teenager or young adult but in other cases it could be something as small as an argument with someone or if you’re feeling insecure, some people are weaker than others and find it difficult to handle certain situations so they result in self harm because they feel as though they deserve the pain they think they have caused.

You can’t judge people for self harming if you genuinely know nothing about them. It is the same as my previous post about eating disorders, a lot of the time self harm is to do with your emotions and it is a way of letting things out. Just think before you call someone an attention seeker for doing it because facts show that the majority of teenagers who self harm have had to deal with something traumatic earlier in their life.

There are so many ways that you can recover from self harm. If you are a school or college student I suggest going to speak to the pastoral carer before any of your friends because they are experienced and have dealt with situations like it before whereas your friends may not understand and you may not be ready to talk in detail about it, your pastoral carer should give you advice and will try and edge you into talking to your parents/guardians or friends about it, which is the next step and which will help. The more support you have the better and if you have your friends, they will help you take your mind of everything which makes you feel upset in your life! That’s what friends are for.

Again, send me asks/tweet or facebook me if you want to talk, I dont care if you dont know me. I just want to help. Smile:) Create, don’t cut ❤